Late again...

But at least I'm here.

I never went back to yesterday and filled in my eating, so here is yesterday's mess:

breakfast:

cinnamon bagel with butter (both halves); milk with ovaltine

Lunch:

fried shrimp; french fries; onion rings; diet coke with lemon at Mike's Clam Shack

Snack:

chocolate truffle at bakery on way to LL Bean (stopped to use the ladies' room)

Snack:

mocha coolatta at Dunkin Donuts on way home from Freeport

Dinner:

small piece of steak; baked beans; 3 cookies

Late night:

ice cream with chocolate sauce

So... no veggies all day... and way too much sugar... and fried food...

Am I trying to kill myself?!

Today I am meeting Viv and Jessica at Mike's, so there will be a repeat performance of fried food. I went to the store this morning and got a bran muffin, but how good is that, really?

So today looks like this:

Breakfast:

bran muffin; banana; 12 ounces milk (no ovaltine today)

More later...

Update:

We went to Mike's and Viv and I split a seafood platter. Then we went kayaking up the York River for 2 hours. We ended the day walking the Fisherman's Walk and the Cliff Path in York. It was a beautiful day ~ practically perfect! On the way home, I got a mocha coolatta at Dunkin Donuts...

And it went down hill from there, believe it or not.

Around 7:30, I decided to have something for "dinner." I chose peanutbutter crackers, but in Maine that means saltines and jif. I ate way too many ~ part of bringing the sleeve of crackers and the jar of peanutbutter in the livingroom with me... I had them with milk. A little while later I had a brownie with ice cream and chocolate sauce... and then a few chips... and finally an orange before I quit for the evening ~ YIKES! This was stress and depression eating. What was I stressed and depressed about? Who knows?

Maybe it was the kayaking ~ I am 50 pounds heavier (at least) than I should be and the added weight makes my boat sit lower in the water. It makes it harder for me to get in and out and to fit properly. Because the boat is low in the water, it is harder to maneuver and when waves crash, they splash over the bow more readily. All of this serves to confirm my shame. It should make me behave better ~ logic would point to that ~ but there is nothing logical about this weight struggle, that's for sure. Ugh!